Wedding$

sumdood
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San Clemente, CA US
Fantasy
3/24/2018 1:58am
SEE ARE125 wrote:
$450 for us. That's wedding, cake and photos. We eloped. I would get annoyingly specific with all the $0.50 crap. "Well we have 100 guests, but...
$450 for us. That's wedding, cake and photos. We eloped.

I would get annoyingly specific with all the $0.50 crap. "Well we have 100 guests, but 27 are kids so we only need 73 knives, the kids don't need knives. Robert's sloppy ass never uses a napkin, he prefers his sleeve, so only 99 of those. Mark is a habitual ice cruncher, but it's annoying as hell so everyone gets ice cubes except Mark. Fuck Mark."
That's a pretty good idea ! Laughing
MR. X
Posts
6913
Joined
6/24/2010
Location
North Tonawanda, NY US
3/24/2018 5:08am
Ebs wrote:
I like this plan, take the wedding money do this: [quote] “If you have someone that you think is The One, don’t just think in your...
I like this plan, take the wedding money do this:




“If you have someone that you think is The One, don’t just think in your ordinary mind, ‘Okay, let’s make a date, let’s plan this and make a party and get married.’ Take that person and travel around the world. Buy a plane ticket for the two of you to travel all around the world, and go to places that are hard to go to and hard to get out of. And if when you land at JFK and you’re still in love with that person, get married at the airport.”

-Bill Murray

Everyone know the real test . Lock her and your dog in the trunk of your car for 2 days ,if she comes out after 2 days and is as happy to see you as your dog is ,you got a keeper.
JRT812
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2769
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Location
Cottontown, TN US
3/24/2018 6:00am
JRT812 wrote:
Got married at a church and had a BBQ for the reception. Sounds redneck, but we had a good time. It was small, quick, immediate family...
Got married at a church and had a BBQ for the reception. Sounds redneck, but we had a good time. It was small, quick, immediate family and close friends. My only regret is not taking a proper honeymoon. We had just purchased a house and used our money saved on the small wedding to put towards the house. Little did I know there is always money needed to put into your property. New or old it doesn’t matter.
peelout wrote:
kind of in the same boat right now. we have a bitchin' in-ground pool but the surrounding yard around the pool is useless and i want...
kind of in the same boat right now. we have a bitchin' in-ground pool but the surrounding yard around the pool is useless and i want to build a sweet-ass pool patio and pool-house. i'm thinking 15k or so... so i want a small cheap wedding.

tough decision
Congrats on the engagement!
mxdude105
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628
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Location
MD US
3/24/2018 6:43am
This is a good thread. I'm blown away at the cost of weddings these days and how it's become an "industry" that people can make a damn good living for themselves doing. Quite frankly it disgusts me that people can make so much money by taking pictures, shuffling music on a laptop, and laying out decorations at a banquet hall...and that couples will happily pay for it so that girls can live out a childish fantasy.

Whenever I get into a discussion with a woman about how stupid big weddings are and she uses the "but girls dream about it their whole lives" rigamarole, I hit her with "Yeah well I've always dreamed about being a submarine captain. But I'm not about to spend 50k of mine and my families money to rent the Navy Yard for the day and live out a fantasy." They never have an answer for that.

My GF and I have been together for a few years and if it was up to me we wouldn't even bother with a wedding. The way I see it, we already live together and share our lives, what would change if we got married? Nothing. It's just a formality. And if it's just a formality, there's no reason whatsoever to spend 20k on a one-day party.

My chick mostly agrees with this but I know it still matters to her, so I'm sure at some point we'll tie the knot. If/when we do, it'll be a low cost, casual deal with family and close friends. Money much better spent on a house or even an awesome vacation.

The Shop

TXDirt
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Plano, TX US
3/24/2018 7:11am
IWreckALot wrote:
If your chick is laid back, which I assume she is or you wouldn't be with her, opt for the pool house expenditure and cheap out...
If your chick is laid back, which I assume she is or you wouldn't be with her, opt for the pool house expenditure and cheap out on the wedding.

I got lucky with my wedding. Think I paid about $5,000 for 200 people at the wedding. We have a lake house and right across the street is a wedding venue that my mom was friends with. She bartered with the lady. Made some chair covers for her in exchange to drop the price of the venue.

Outside of that, I wouldn't have put much emphasis on our wedding. In the end, the amount of money people spend on a 2 or 3 hour event is asinine. You'll enjoy the pool house and patio exponentially more than that three hours.
peelout wrote:
completely agree with you on that. we've decided that $5k is our max for the actual wedding festivities. being in Utah we have some amazing country...
completely agree with you on that. we've decided that $5k is our max for the actual wedding festivities. being in Utah we have some amazing country and a good friend has some great property in the mountains 20 minutes from my house, i think we'll try to do something low-key like that.

and yes, the pool-house and patio will be a much better way to spend some money
If you are creative and resourceful you can do a lot with 5k. Example, simply going down to hobby lobby and buying your own table center pieces will save you hundreds of dollars. And will look the same or better as anything else you can get.
3/29/2018 1:30am Edited Date/Time 3/29/2018 1:36am
MR. X wrote:
My wife took care of the whole deal . We rented the hall at my dads firehall , had some one decorate it . Hired an...
My wife took care of the whole deal . We rented the hall at my dads firehall , had some one decorate it . Hired an outside caterer . Hired a DJ. 11 grand total . Some people go crazy on wedding ,we wanted a big party that we could also take part in .
Same. I think we were near $12,000 and some change. Got about $15,000 in cards. Made money off our wedding. Haha

Bought all the booze at the PX. Tax free. Hired 2 bartenders that I like at my local bar for $250 and I let them keep tips.

800 for wedding singer. Actual band. Not a douschey dj.

Biggest tab was $6000 for the food but we had 300 people packed in.

Center pieces we made. Cut wood, stained them. Used empty wine bottles wrapped rope around them. Etc. we did pay some lady $500 to rent linens and gave her set all the tables up.

My grandparents made probably 1000 cookies for the dressert table.

Wiseco donated 500 key chains for the seat chart.

Just get creative. Don’t pay the wedding tax.


Call a venue ask them what they want for a family reunion. Two days later call and ask about the same venue but say it’s for a wedding and watch how drastically different the price is. Ahhhh the wedding tax. Then call them out on it and hang up. (Did that myself)

College and weddings 2 biggest scams going on right now to rake in money.

3/29/2018 1:45am
Whatever happens just remember to enjoy the day. It goes by so fast. Don’t skimp on a wedding photographer. We kinda went for the cheapest we could find. I shoulda paid 2500 for someone good instead of a 1200 budget guy.









sumdood
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San Clemente, CA US
Fantasy
3/29/2018 8:18am Edited Date/Time 3/29/2018 8:24am
Well fuckballs you got me worried now, we hired a photographer and his helper for $1,050'. He did a wedding for one of our employees and the pictures turned out good, so hopefully they'll come out good for us too. He's a long time friend of the guy that got married and gave us "The cool guy brotherhood local friend deal bro" Guess we'll keep our fingers crossed. He's a younger guy in his 20's but has done over 250 weddings and from what I've seen looks like he knows what he's doing. We also used his contact for the DJ, $850' which is supposed to be a deal (I guess ?) Seems kind of high for what he's doing but one thing I've learned is at this point the best course of action for me is to stfu and just write the check. Both these guys are younger and semi just starting out, but I have faith in them ! Laughing Laughing Luckily our daughter and her fiancé aren't obsessed with a high dollar "over the top" wedding. They're more concerned about a down to earth fun wedding, and a kick ass 2 week honeymoon Cool I'll enjoy the day don't worry, there's going to be some emotional moments I'm sure, but it'll be fun. I still have to figure out a speech, so far I have "Welcome everybody...." and a blank sheet of paper lol. Which brings up another topic, Got any good speech ideas ?

ps. The personalized glasses are classic !
akillerwombat
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3211
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Location
Los Angeles, CA US
3/29/2018 8:21am Edited Date/Time 3/29/2018 8:27am
Ebs wrote:
I like this plan, take the wedding money do this: [quote] “If you have someone that you think is The One, don’t just think in your...
I like this plan, take the wedding money do this:




“If you have someone that you think is The One, don’t just think in your ordinary mind, ‘Okay, let’s make a date, let’s plan this and make a party and get married.’ Take that person and travel around the world. Buy a plane ticket for the two of you to travel all around the world, and go to places that are hard to go to and hard to get out of. And if when you land at JFK and you’re still in love with that person, get married at the airport.”

-Bill Murray

We did that, been around the world with the girl and now we're saving up to get married... abroad... not cheap, haha.
TXDirt
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Location
Plano, TX US
3/29/2018 9:00am
sumdood wrote:
Well fuckballs you got me worried now, we hired a photographer and his helper for $1,050'. He did a wedding for one of our employees and...
Well fuckballs you got me worried now, we hired a photographer and his helper for $1,050'. He did a wedding for one of our employees and the pictures turned out good, so hopefully they'll come out good for us too. He's a long time friend of the guy that got married and gave us "The cool guy brotherhood local friend deal bro" Guess we'll keep our fingers crossed. He's a younger guy in his 20's but has done over 250 weddings and from what I've seen looks like he knows what he's doing. We also used his contact for the DJ, $850' which is supposed to be a deal (I guess ?) Seems kind of high for what he's doing but one thing I've learned is at this point the best course of action for me is to stfu and just write the check. Both these guys are younger and semi just starting out, but I have faith in them ! Laughing Laughing Luckily our daughter and her fiancé aren't obsessed with a high dollar "over the top" wedding. They're more concerned about a down to earth fun wedding, and a kick ass 2 week honeymoon Cool I'll enjoy the day don't worry, there's going to be some emotional moments I'm sure, but it'll be fun. I still have to figure out a speech, so far I have "Welcome everybody...." and a blank sheet of paper lol. Which brings up another topic, Got any good speech ideas ?

ps. The personalized glasses are classic !
I've shot a few weddings and have done a decent job. One thing to let your photographer know (he probably already does) but sometimes they need reminding, he needs to shoot the entire time. The standard bride/groom pics, pics of family etc are easy and obvious. What you want is hundreds, no, thousands of candids and pictures of people who don't even know they are being photographed. Those are the best pictures.

I've been to many weddings where the photographer just isn't taking nearly enough photos. And worse when he sits down to eat for 45 minutes. No. A good photographer snacks when he can. And he is always taking photos of something. Anything.

Something else we did is we placed 2 or 3 disposable cameras on every table. They are cheap and it gave the guests an opportunity to take a few photos. They really turned out great because you get a lot of unexpected photos!
3/29/2018 10:08am
I got married in Vegas honeymooned in Kauai for 10 days for 7k. I've seen too many 25k + weddings end in 100k + divorces. Being married is tough we didn't think a marriage should start on a fantasy. Oh and if you think you're getting raped now wait till you have a baby. Baby showers are nuts nowadays.
Shawn142
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2602
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Location
Burleson, TX US
3/29/2018 10:25am
My father-in-law got out lucky because at the time her family were being d-bags about the whole relationship. In total I think my marriage cost $100. A JOP came to our apartment and married us in the dining room. No guests or anything from either side. Coming up on our 10 year anniversary in a few months.
TXDirt
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Plano, TX US
3/29/2018 11:46am
Something else I learned from the guy who did my wedding photos....

Put together a list in Excel of all of the traditional wedding photos you want.

Bride and Groom
Bride and Mom
Bride and Dad
Bride and Mom and Dad
Groom and Mom
Groom and Dad
Groom and Mom and Dad
Bride and Groom and both sets of parents
Groom and Bride and Best man and Maid of Honor
etc etc etc etc

You will be surprised at all of the different combinations you will have.

Print this sheet out and give to best man and to best woman and have them call out who is needed in the next photo. And have them mark off after each photo is done.

It can also help to logically group the photos you want. If you want old aunt claire in some photos then group those together so you are not running around looking for her every 10 minutes. Especially kids. Group these photos together.

Anyways, that helped us a ton and made the after wedding photos go much faster and far more organized then trying to think in my head all of the combinations of photos we wanted. We already had it all down on paper.
kkawboy14
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11486
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Location
TX US
3/29/2018 11:52am
Uncle Tony wrote:
I wish all you guys best wishes in your future marriages!!!! Not trying to be a kill joy but the divorce rate in the United States...
I wish all you guys best wishes in your future marriages!!!!

Not trying to be a kill joy but the divorce rate in the United States is 50% so please be careful guys, my divorce is almost final, I stayed in a bad relationship for my girls, once they moved out I said I'm out

I believe in marriage, and have no regrets
It’s worse than that 50% of America doesn’t get married then 50% of the 50% get divorced.

If you thought the wedding was expensive......
PC
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474
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Location
GU US
3/29/2018 12:09pm
I guess I got lucky in that my wife did not care for a big wedding. We flew to Maui, got married on the beach and then bummed around the islands for 2 weeks. The only real cost (besides the flight & condo) was the photographer. We didn't invite anyone....its our day, not theirs.

Zero regrets. This was back in 2005, but I think I was out less than $5k for the whole ordeal.
Her parents offered to pay for a big reception (as they did for their other daughter), but I told my FIL to go a motorcycle instead. He's now got 3. Guess who their favorite son-in-law is!
NorCal 50+
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Grass Valley, CA US
3/29/2018 5:50pm
Ah man...don't let it get you down. It would suck for you to sit there thinking about all the $$$$. All the money we earn gets spent eventually anyhow. Tongue

That said, any chance they have to take money based on emotion or appearances will be exploited 1000%. My bro's daughter, my niece, got married. She works at Marriott as an event planner, sorority girl, fancy tastes etc. so she needed the works. It ended up being $50,000. He agreed to chip in and his cut was $10k. Now as a working married couple with two kids, they seem to struggle a bit financially. They should have put the money down on a house and had a party there instead.

The only thing worse is funerals. When my Dad died I realized what a sick racket that is. The guy acted all concerned and then for some reason a payment didn't go through and they were pretty much ruthless. The funeral home told us to cough up the cash or the funeral wouldn't happen (we were busy managing our dad's death and dealing with all that). They realize how incredibly embarrassing a funeral being cancelled for lack of payment would be. I can't imagine how poor people handle the death of a loved one with any dignity because my Dad had money and was respected in the community and it was still a PITA
My wedding consisted of driving down to the JOP, paying a few bucks, celebrating with a Bloody Mary and going home. But we are in a special situation with family (we have none).
TXDirt
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3/29/2018 6:08pm
NorCal 50+ wrote:
Ah man...don't let it get you down. It would suck for you to sit there thinking about all the $$$$. All the money we earn gets...
Ah man...don't let it get you down. It would suck for you to sit there thinking about all the $$$$. All the money we earn gets spent eventually anyhow. Tongue

That said, any chance they have to take money based on emotion or appearances will be exploited 1000%. My bro's daughter, my niece, got married. She works at Marriott as an event planner, sorority girl, fancy tastes etc. so she needed the works. It ended up being $50,000. He agreed to chip in and his cut was $10k. Now as a working married couple with two kids, they seem to struggle a bit financially. They should have put the money down on a house and had a party there instead.

The only thing worse is funerals. When my Dad died I realized what a sick racket that is. The guy acted all concerned and then for some reason a payment didn't go through and they were pretty much ruthless. The funeral home told us to cough up the cash or the funeral wouldn't happen (we were busy managing our dad's death and dealing with all that). They realize how incredibly embarrassing a funeral being cancelled for lack of payment would be. I can't imagine how poor people handle the death of a loved one with any dignity because my Dad had money and was respected in the community and it was still a PITA
My wedding consisted of driving down to the JOP, paying a few bucks, celebrating with a Bloody Mary and going home. But we are in a special situation with family (we have none).
Yeah unless money is no object then 50k for a wedding is obscene. This is where hubby gotta put the foot down. The Bible teaches that man is head of house. Now, my wife gets to do anything she wants. But she’s knows a 50k wedding ain’t happening. Balance is important.
peelout
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18358
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Location
Ogden, UT US
3/30/2018 10:30am
TXDirt wrote:
Something else I learned from the guy who did my wedding photos.... Put together a list in Excel of all of the traditional wedding photos you...
Something else I learned from the guy who did my wedding photos....

Put together a list in Excel of all of the traditional wedding photos you want.

Bride and Groom
Bride and Mom
Bride and Dad
Bride and Mom and Dad
Groom and Mom
Groom and Dad
Groom and Mom and Dad
Bride and Groom and both sets of parents
Groom and Bride and Best man and Maid of Honor
etc etc etc etc

You will be surprised at all of the different combinations you will have.

Print this sheet out and give to best man and to best woman and have them call out who is needed in the next photo. And have them mark off after each photo is done.

It can also help to logically group the photos you want. If you want old aunt claire in some photos then group those together so you are not running around looking for her every 10 minutes. Especially kids. Group these photos together.

Anyways, that helped us a ton and made the after wedding photos go much faster and far more organized then trying to think in my head all of the combinations of photos we wanted. We already had it all down on paper.
Print this sheet out and give to best man and to best woman and have them call out who is needed in the next photo. And have them mark off after each photo is done.


you guys charge a lot of fuckin' money to have other people do your work for you bro
early
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University Heights, OH US
3/30/2018 11:09am
peelout wrote:
[b][i]Print this sheet out and give to best man and to best woman and have them call out who is needed in the next photo. And...
Print this sheet out and give to best man and to best woman and have them call out who is needed in the next photo. And have them mark off after each photo is done.


you guys charge a lot of fuckin' money to have other people do your work for you bro
The best man or woman should have a better idea of who they are looking for than the photographers which could help expedite the process and make sure no one is overlooked, bro.
peelout
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Ogden, UT US
3/30/2018 1:34pm
peelout wrote:
[b][i]Print this sheet out and give to best man and to best woman and have them call out who is needed in the next photo. And...
Print this sheet out and give to best man and to best woman and have them call out who is needed in the next photo. And have them mark off after each photo is done.


you guys charge a lot of fuckin' money to have other people do your work for you bro
early wrote:
The best man or woman should have a better idea of who they are looking for than the photographers which could help expedite the process and...
The best man or woman should have a better idea of who they are looking for than the photographers which could help expedite the process and make sure no one is overlooked, bro.
so it's someones job to babysit the photog and hold their hand throughout the night? yeah no thanks brosephinski
TXDirt
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3/30/2018 2:33pm Edited Date/Time 3/30/2018 2:33pm
peelout wrote:
[b][i]Print this sheet out and give to best man and to best woman and have them call out who is needed in the next photo. And...
Print this sheet out and give to best man and to best woman and have them call out who is needed in the next photo. And have them mark off after each photo is done.


you guys charge a lot of fuckin' money to have other people do your work for you bro
early wrote:
The best man or woman should have a better idea of who they are looking for than the photographers which could help expedite the process and...
The best man or woman should have a better idea of who they are looking for than the photographers which could help expedite the process and make sure no one is overlooked, bro.
peelout wrote:
so it's someones job to babysit the photog and hold their hand throughout the night? yeah no thanks brosephinski
After you sit through the wedding service and now have to do photos for an hour, and heaven forbid you have any cranky kids too, you will appreciate a bit of organization to the formal photos. It’s not holding photogs hand. He/She has no idea who the fuck you want in your photos. So it’s not his job. Nor is it his job to chase people down for the formal photos.

The formal photos right after ceremony kinda suck so the quicker you can get through it and maintain your sanity the better.
MR. X
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North Tonawanda, NY US
3/30/2018 3:41pm
We did our pictures first ,then the ceremony so we could use the hour of open bar with our guests.
3/30/2018 3:46pm
50K weddings are the norm in SoCal...you can spend 10K on photography, easily. Everyone has different expectations for photography and video so it's all relative. But nowadays it seems everyone is a photographer....no joke. Buy a camera and call yourself a photographer on instagram...they're everywhere.

I've shot weddings and the minimum I would charge is 5K for two shooters, slideshow, album, and the editing. Good thing I don't do it for a living.
peelout
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Ogden, UT US
3/30/2018 4:07pm
early wrote:
The best man or woman should have a better idea of who they are looking for than the photographers which could help expedite the process and...
The best man or woman should have a better idea of who they are looking for than the photographers which could help expedite the process and make sure no one is overlooked, bro.
peelout wrote:
so it's someones job to babysit the photog and hold their hand throughout the night? yeah no thanks brosephinski
TXDirt wrote:
After you sit through the wedding service and now have to do photos for an hour, and heaven forbid you have any cranky kids too, you...
After you sit through the wedding service and now have to do photos for an hour, and heaven forbid you have any cranky kids too, you will appreciate a bit of organization to the formal photos. It’s not holding photogs hand. He/She has no idea who the fuck you want in your photos. So it’s not his job. Nor is it his job to chase people down for the formal photos.

The formal photos right after ceremony kinda suck so the quicker you can get through it and maintain your sanity the better.
for the formal pictures sure, but the host ought to get that shit done before the party starts. once the reception starts the photog should be smart enough to pay attention to what's going on around them without having a personal escort all night, especially for the pretty fuckin' penny they're getting paid to be there.
early
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University Heights, OH US
3/30/2018 6:49pm Edited Date/Time 3/30/2018 6:58pm
peelout wrote:
for the formal pictures sure, but the host ought to get that shit done before the party starts. once the reception starts the photog should be...
for the formal pictures sure, but the host ought to get that shit done before the party starts. once the reception starts the photog should be smart enough to pay attention to what's going on around them without having a personal escort all night, especially for the pretty fuckin' penny they're getting paid to be there.
All he was talking about was formal pics after the ceremony, not all night.
TXDirt
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3/30/2018 6:50pm Edited Date/Time 3/30/2018 6:52pm
peelout wrote:
so it's someones job to babysit the photog and hold their hand throughout the night? yeah no thanks brosephinski
TXDirt wrote:
After you sit through the wedding service and now have to do photos for an hour, and heaven forbid you have any cranky kids too, you...
After you sit through the wedding service and now have to do photos for an hour, and heaven forbid you have any cranky kids too, you will appreciate a bit of organization to the formal photos. It’s not holding photogs hand. He/She has no idea who the fuck you want in your photos. So it’s not his job. Nor is it his job to chase people down for the formal photos.

The formal photos right after ceremony kinda suck so the quicker you can get through it and maintain your sanity the better.
peelout wrote:
for the formal pictures sure, but the host ought to get that shit done before the party starts. once the reception starts the photog should be...
for the formal pictures sure, but the host ought to get that shit done before the party starts. once the reception starts the photog should be smart enough to pay attention to what's going on around them without having a personal escort all night, especially for the pretty fuckin' penny they're getting paid to be there.
Yeah I was just talking about the formal photos. After that photog is on his own and better earn his mint. No hand holding after the gate drops!

And a lot of those formal photos can’t be done until after the ceremony. Some can yes. But a lot if them can’t.
Stanford
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290
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Location
TN US
3/30/2018 7:13pm
When we got married I was finding the same thing here in TN. My mom is from England so I started looking there as an option. Plus this would give my wife the chance to meet my extended family over there, and my wife's white trash family couldn't go. At the time you had to be in country for 18 days, but in Scotland you just have to be there for a day. We got married in a 12th century abbey ruin (Sweetheart Abbey) with a bagpiper, photographer and videographer, spent the first night of our honeymoon in a 13th century castle (Comlongon Castle, including a dinner for about 20 people), then spent a week in London (mom paid for that). Wedding including flights for the two of us was under $5k, and it was very unique. Of course she bitched about not having a wedding cake.....

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