does drug rehab work?

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10/10/2017 4:25 PM

Ill tell my story. I understand Ill open myself to criticism here but at this point I'm desperate to break out of this lifestlye. I feel some others on the board have been here as well, as I've searched similar scenarios on vital. And if nothing else.. hopefully this will detour someone on the same path.

Obviously, like most of you Im a moto head. My trouble came on labor day in 2014, I cased a triple and shattered my heel. Ive had plenty of other injueries in the past but this one was by far the most painful. I couldn't walk for months, and basically sat on my couch alone between trips of crawling to the bathroom. Ive had opiate painkillers before and knew i like the way they made me feel, but this time they got ahold of me good. The same brain that craved adrenaline seemed to like the buzz of pain killers even more. At first when i took them it felt like being handed the answer to all my probelms in life. Confident, outgoing, everything made sense and was interesting...


In the past 3 years its been long stretches of using with small periods of sobriety here and there but I've always fell back in my old ways and this last time, well it just feels inescapable.

And before you tell me I carved this path on my own, my suffering is at my own hand - trust me I know. This journey has taught me humility, if nothing else. I used to think of addicts as weak minded burnouts. I had zero sympathy for them. Now here I am.

As previously mentioned, I have had periods of abstinence. Usually with the help of subutex (whether thats "clean" or not is a debate in itself)... Now Im on such a run that I can't get thru the acute withdrawals. And Ive jumped back and forth from subs to opiates I find the subs have no effect.

I know everyones rock bottom is different, is this isnt my own I dont know what is. Ive lost everything but my job and my truck. Everyday is a scramble to find what I need simply to function. I know to an outsider this is laughable but to be in this predicament is terrifying. Everyday is like the movie groundhogs day. Go to work, get your fix, pass out full of guilt and shame. Repeat. As tolerance goes up so does the cost of just "staying ok" then your to the point where you have no $ at all times and no possensions worth anything.

I get it. Other people have problems, and they didnt choose them. But i cant continue down this path. Its maddening and destructive. I cant imagine what my family must feel.

The one thing I haven't tried is inpatient rehab. Im strongly pushed towards this by many in my life. The statistics dont look good for opiate addicts, and honeslty I'm terrified of going. Just looking if anyone has been or knew anyone that has. Thanks


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10/10/2017 4:44 PM

Mind over matter. Focus on the positives you do have in your life and keep pushing forward. If you want it bad enough and you're acknowledging you do need help you're already going in the right direction.

I never dealt with addiction issues but have struggled with mental issues since I was a young child. In my late teens I just had enough of feeling like shit so I acknowledged that I absolutely needed help. I seeked doctors, psychologists/psychiatrist and things eventually got better. I was feeling normal for a few years then I had my accident and it's been an uphill battle ever since. I have good days and bad days just like everyone else in the world.

I know our situations are different but if you're determined to get past the issues you're dealing with all the help you need is out there but it ultimately starts with you. If you're willing to put yourself first before anything else going on in your life you'll get through it no doubt about it.

I know I didn't offer you much help but good luck and keep pushing forward.

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"Sorry Goose, but it's time to buzz the tower."

10/10/2017 4:54 PM

One of my good buddies was real bad , he was a pharmacist so he had the means to get really deep. He was taking 8 10s twice a day (i think thats correct) he used the suboxone to help with the withdrawals . Actually the guy they were all buying from had a moment and felt really guilty for how many people he was selling to and how bad their life was that he started selling the suboxone also. I dont have any personal experience with addiction other then cigarettes that im currently winning. I wish you the best of luck on your journey from here on out , im certain you are ready for the tremendous battle from here on out .

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10/10/2017 5:06 PM

-MAVERICK- wrote:

Mind over matter. Focus on the positives you do have in your life and keep pushing forward. If you want it bad enough and you're acknowledging you do need help you're already going in the right direction.

I never dealt with addiction issues but have struggled with mental issues since I was a young child. In my late teens I just had enough of feeling like shit so I acknowledged that I absolutely needed help. I seeked doctors, psychologists/psychiatrist and things eventually got better. I was feeling normal for a few years then I had my accident and it's been an uphill battle ever since. I have good days and bad days just like everyone else in the world.

I know our situations are different but if you're determined to get past the issues you're dealing with all the help you need is out there but it ultimately starts with you. If you're willing to put yourself first before anything else going on in your life you'll get through it no doubt about it.

I know I didn't offer you much help but good luck and keep pushing forward.

Same here. As a kid I had rampant OCD and anxiety. Probably started when I was 7 and continued up to the time I started self medicating. Insomnia so bad Id go several days without sleep and hallucinate.


I think about that often. If I was a child and able to deal with these things why cant I beat this as a grown man? I can't answer it. It seems strange to complain of something self-inflicted, but i know now after being here that I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. The worst part is knowing you can stop or change but you don't. Just keep on your merry way of doom

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10/10/2017 5:07 PM
Edited Date/Time: 10/10/2017 5:07 PM

Doofy, get some professional help. It will take a commitment from you but having the outside help is often all that addicts need.

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Braaapin' aint easy.

10/10/2017 5:17 PM

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10/10/2017 5:18 PM

Better to come off and not use other drugs to do it. That is Narconon's approach.

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10/10/2017 5:27 PM
Edited Date/Time: 10/10/2017 5:28 PM

I dunno.....everyone's different.
You might be to the point that Falcons advice is all you need.
At least you're not in denial.

Keep up the fight, it's the enemy. A sneaky thing that tries to ingrain itself on you, keeping yourself from being the true you. The confidence, the self assurance will come in a few years time, trust me,

You're smart enough to see the problem, that's a real good start.


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10/10/2017 5:48 PM

motogrady wrote:

I dunno.....everyone's different.
You might be to the point that Falcons advice is all you need.
At least you're not in denial.

Keep up the fight, it's the enemy. A sneaky thing that tries to ingrain itself on you, keeping yourself from being the true you. The confidence, the self assurance will come in a few years time, trust me,

You're smart enough to see the problem, that's a real good start.


Well, for the first couple years it was just a fun thing to do if i had the extra cash. I still went to work and fulfilled all my obligations. Everyone caught on after a bit and i gave the "i dont have a problem, Ill stop when i want" thing. God, what i would give to go back to those days when quitting wasn't as futile as trying to derail a freight train by hand.

Im still fairly "new" by addict standards. The amount of money spent is disgusting. I could have a new 450 AND 250 of every color, and a brand new truck to drive them around in. I try not to focus on what is lost, but rather what is to gain. I still have somehow managed to hold onto a career - and a damn good one at that. If i can come out of this, Id be the happiest man on this earth. Sometimes I think this is a test, and maybe this is something I had to go thru to enhance the rest of my life. "A right of passage"

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10/10/2017 6:01 PM

I know 3 people thatve overcome drugs to lead happy, sober lives. I know a whole lot more that haven't won that fight yet, and too many that lost the fight. I'll never get to see them again.

1 guy found god, and his gf gave birth to his kid. Worked for him, but I wouldn't suggest having kids to kick a drug addiction.
Another had to have his leg amputated, get cut off from friends/family, and spend some time homeless. Again, I wouldn't suggest this route. But it worked for him.
Another woke up one day, flushed his meth down the toliet. Went to his parents and begged for help. They locked him in the basement for a few months. He sobered up down there, and hasn't touched shit since. That leads me to believe rehab can work, if you want it to.
The biggest mistake I've seen people make, is hanging out with the same old drug addict friends. Best advice I can give you is to get sober, and then start over. New job, new state, new friends.
Good luck brother.

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10/10/2017 6:10 PM

Props to you for seeking some guidence. That's a good first step. You know you have a problem.

I would consider joining an AA group. Get you a mentor. AA can help with not only alcohol but substance abuse in general.

I can't offer much in advice because I battle my own demons. I have a very addictive personality. And that's been good and bad. On one hand I started a software business in my late teens that has given me a lot financially. On the other hand I have a lot of shit going on up stairs. My family thinks I may be Bi Polar. Depressed. Anger management issues. The mind is a very peculiar and complex thing.

Are you married? Any kids?

My only advice is to find something else to get addicted to. Maybe that's your job. Maybe it's video games. Perhaps it's carpentry.

I go thorough phases. Might become a Gardner for 6 months. Then drop all that and play COD for 11 months straight. Then drop that and go work at the food kitchen for 3 months. Etc.

Probably not much help.

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10/10/2017 6:12 PM

^ I tried the "lock myself in the house" thing. Went to my parents, gave em my keys and wallet, took a weeks vacation. After a couple days I was broken and made up a bs story to leave, you can guess the rest.

This has weakened my resolve to near nothing. Failure after failure sets a pattern and builds a roadblock.

I consider the rehab thing because you kinda "forced". Often your in another state, and you have no one to call and no place to go. I feel I used to have an iron will. Nowadays, if something is slightly difficult I throw my hands up and walk away. Addicton spills over into every aspect of life, and sooner or later you have a one track mind.

Its such a waste. In my late 20s, in an able body and pissing away what is supposed to be my best/most capable time of my life being broke and desperate.

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10/10/2017 6:23 PM

TXDirt wrote:

Props to you for seeking some guidence. That's a good first step. You know you have a problem.

I would consider joining an AA group. Get you a mentor. AA can help with not only alcohol but substance abuse in general.

I can't offer much in advice because I battle my own demons. I have a very addictive personality. And that's been good and bad. On one hand I started a software business in my late teens that has given me a lot financially. On the other hand I have a lot of shit going on up stairs. My family thinks I may be Bi Polar. Depressed. Anger management issues. The mind is a very peculiar and complex thing.

Are you married? Any kids?

My only advice is to find something else to get addicted to. Maybe that's your job. Maybe it's video games. Perhaps it's carpentry.

I go thorough phases. Might become a Gardner for 6 months. Then drop all that and play COD for 11 months straight. Then drop that and go work at the food kitchen for 3 months. Etc.

Probably not much help.

I am not married. I was in a 8 year long relationship with a girl I had basically built everything I had in my adult life with, but she tapped out about a year ago. I still love the girl like crazy, and she loves me but she had her fill. We have a 7 year old daughter that I see on my days off. I work 2nd shift and thats the only time I get with her.

I actually applaud her for having the strength to do so. Its something else always on my conscience, making her choose between a wrecked life of constant stress and arguing with me or the unknown.

Its in my blood. Thats no cop out, but I do believe addiction/mental illness is hereditary. The first/only time Ive seen my dad break down was probably 15 years ago, he was struggling with the same thing after breaking his back. At the time I didnt know it, but he told me when I came to him about my issue. I remember that day like it was yesterday. All i thought was "i know it sucks but just grit your teeth for a week or 2 then youll be fine".... little did i know.

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10/10/2017 6:43 PM

doofy wrote:

^ I tried the "lock myself in the house" thing. Went to my parents, gave em my keys and wallet, took a weeks vacation. After a couple days I was broken and made up a bs story to leave, you can guess the rest.

This has weakened my resolve to near nothing. Failure after failure sets a pattern and builds a roadblock.

I consider the rehab thing because you kinda "forced". Often your in another state, and you have no one to call and no place to go. I feel I used to have an iron will. Nowadays, if something is slightly difficult I throw my hands up and walk away. Addicton spills over into every aspect of life, and sooner or later you have a one track mind.

Its such a waste. In my late 20s, in an able body and pissing away what is supposed to be my best/most capable time of my life being broke and desperate.

My suggestion is rehab now- commit to it like a big double and don't look back, ever. Having people to share your stories with and give you feedback is absolutely invaluable. I wouldn't beat yourself up because you couldn't just sit in a room and be cured. What are the odds of that?
My father-in-law was a hardcore alcoholic (wake up and drink a bottle of liquor kind of dude) went to inpatient rehab, kicked it in a few weeks, and went back to a normal life, and he was in his early 60s. I have had other friends who ruined their lives and lost everything with pills. Curing yourself is a very tall order. Good luck dude.


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It's impossible for a corporation or government to love you or care about you.

10/10/2017 7:00 PM

doofy, I know two people that were in your situation. Recognizing their problem, limping along in life to make it to the next day to finally do something with their issue. Tomorrow is not the day to do it. TODAY is.

One died from an opiod overdose and left his 9 year old daughter fatherless (she is now 23 and doing well despite her loss). The other had no kids but went from opiates to heroin. He "died" twice but was saved thanks to narcan. He has been in and out of treatment that has basically bankrupted his parents. He has worked hard the last 5 years and is rebuilding his life. His addiction is a day to day struggle that he has to stay focused to continue to improve.

You are you. Heredity is a factor, but you can't use it as a reason for why you can't overcome your situation.

Seek out professional help, don't cling to your reasoning that "you have a good job and a truck" that rationalizes that you are functioning. You are barely surviving now.

VitalMX is not your resource for help in what you need to consider how to move forward but the fact you asked here indicates you are looking for resources. They are there, please, please for you and your young daughter, start today to begin the path to healing and being the person you want to be.

good luck. it's not easy. but you already know that too.

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10/10/2017 7:03 PM

My neighbors son was hooked on pain killers. They spent a small fortune on rehab, car after car as he would total them out, bailing him out of trouble and even leaving him in jail the last time for a few weeks to clean up. His mom took leave from work to stay home to keep an eye on him 24/7. They found his pills in the culvert under the driveway, in the attic, in the vacuum cleaner bag...he hid them everywhere. After a few weeks out of jail she made a quick trip to the grocery store and returned home to find him dead on the floor. Seems he picked up where he left off and it was just too much.

My good friend from high school, his wife was addicted. Spent a couple hundred grand on rehab including the high end place in Malibu. He told me it was just a place for addicts to network with other addicts when they got out. Their kids would come home from school to find mom unconscious on multiple occasions and ultimately dead.

Seen it plenty of times, it takes over and becomes the norm. I hope you find something to focus on to get your ass back on track. Your daughter would be the first thing that comes to mind for me. Good luck and stay strong, Doofy. Your daughter needs you.

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10/10/2017 7:21 PM

AHRMA361 wrote:

doofy, I know two people that were in your situation. Recognizing their problem, limping along in life to make it to the next day to finally do something with their issue. Tomorrow is not the day to do it. TODAY is.

One died from an opiod overdose and left his 9 year old daughter fatherless (she is now 23 and doing well despite her loss). The other had no kids but went from opiates to heroin. He "died" twice but was saved thanks to narcan. He has been in and out of treatment that has basically bankrupted his parents. He has worked hard the last 5 years and is rebuilding his life. His addiction is a day to day struggle that he has to stay focused to continue to improve.

You are you. Heredity is a factor, but you can't use it as a reason for why you can't overcome your situation.

Seek out professional help, don't cling to your reasoning that "you have a good job and a truck" that rationalizes that you are functioning. You are barely surviving now.

VitalMX is not your resource for help in what you need to consider how to move forward but the fact you asked here indicates you are looking for resources. They are there, please, please for you and your young daughter, start today to begin the path to healing and being the person you want to be.

good luck. it's not easy. but you already know that too.

My good job and my truck isnt my reasoning to stay on this path, im just saying that of everything i started with, its all I have left. My garage full of bikes, my apartment, my camaro were the first ones to go. The big ticket items. Then it was my ps4, my sg12's... you get the drift.

Im off tomorrow, Im going to look into places to go. I hear as many negative stories about rehab as I do positive ones, but ultimately its up to the addict. They are the one in the drivers seat. Thats where Im stuck at. I feel if someone wanted anything bad enough they'd have it. If I cant do it on my own, whats paying a professional going to help? How are their words going to motivate me in a way that me watching my life fall apart hasn't? Why would their words be more meaningful to me than my own familys? The one personal account of rehab I have is where a co worker - who didnt know my story - said he went years back to a place in Colorado to dry out, only to find the staff were dealers. He left a couple days later and got on suboxone and tapered off.

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10/10/2017 7:38 PM

doofy wrote:

Ill tell my story. I understand Ill open myself to criticism here but at this point I'm desperate to break out of this lifestlye. I feel some others on the board have been here as well, as I've searched similar scenarios on vital. And if nothing else.. hopefully this will detour someone on the same path.

Obviously, like most of you Im a moto head. My trouble came on labor day in 2014, I cased a triple and shattered my heel. Ive had plenty of other injueries in the past but this one was by far the most painful. I couldn't walk for months, and basically sat on my couch alone between trips of crawling to the bathroom. Ive had opiate painkillers before and knew i like the way they made me feel, but this time they got ahold of me good. The same brain that craved adrenaline seemed to like the buzz of pain killers even more. At first when i took them it felt like being handed the answer to all my probelms in life. Confident, outgoing, everything made sense and was interesting...


In the past 3 years its been long stretches of using with small periods of sobriety here and there but I've always fell back in my old ways and this last time, well it just feels inescapable.

And before you tell me I carved this path on my own, my suffering is at my own hand - trust me I know. This journey has taught me humility, if nothing else. I used to think of addicts as weak minded burnouts. I had zero sympathy for them. Now here I am.

As previously mentioned, I have had periods of abstinence. Usually with the help of subutex (whether thats "clean" or not is a debate in itself)... Now Im on such a run that I can't get thru the acute withdrawals. And Ive jumped back and forth from subs to opiates I find the subs have no effect.

I know everyones rock bottom is different, is this isnt my own I dont know what is. Ive lost everything but my job and my truck. Everyday is a scramble to find what I need simply to function. I know to an outsider this is laughable but to be in this predicament is terrifying. Everyday is like the movie groundhogs day. Go to work, get your fix, pass out full of guilt and shame. Repeat. As tolerance goes up so does the cost of just "staying ok" then your to the point where you have no $ at all times and no possensions worth anything.

I get it. Other people have problems, and they didnt choose them. But i cant continue down this path. Its maddening and destructive. I cant imagine what my family must feel.

The one thing I haven't tried is inpatient rehab. Im strongly pushed towards this by many in my life. The statistics dont look good for opiate addicts, and honeslty I'm terrified of going. Just looking if anyone has been or knew anyone that has. Thanks


Go to rehab. Addiction can be beat but it is nothing to f*ck with. My brother had the same exact injury and it haunted him for a few years. Long story short he couldn't kick them, was prescribed 320 percs/month and ended up putting a gun to his head and taking his own life 3 weeks after his 40th birthday. Leaving behind an 8 and 10 yr old son. He was in a spot he didnt hink he could get out of.
I come from a family of alcoholics/addicts. Most are or have been very successful. I have battled my drinking for over 15 years. All while having a very successful career, wife and family. Pancreatitis, ulcers, and kidney failure is where I have felt the effects. Tomorrow, by the grace of God I will celebrate 365 days sober. Haven't had that since early high school and I'm 40 now. Bottom line, get help, join NA/AA and work as hard at making meetings as you do at getting high. No one is too stupid for recovery, but alot of people are too smart and it kills them. Feel free to message me if you want to chat. Good luck!

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10/10/2017 7:54 PM

Ive recently seen a few people in your situation. Go to rehab to get thru the detox period. Maybe 3-5 days from what i understand (never done opiates myself). Dont stay in rehab too long or youll get too cozy with a bunch of other addicts.

After you get thru detox i think the best thing would be 6 months of hard manual labor. Pick up a second jub loading trucks, landscaping, chopping wood , whatever it takes to come home so tired everyday you couldnt think about partying.

And dont ever touch the shit again. Goodluck.

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10/10/2017 7:58 PM

AHRMA361 wrote:

doofy, I know two people that were in your situation. Recognizing their problem, limping along in life to make it to the next day to finally do something with their issue. Tomorrow is not the day to do it. TODAY is.

One died from an opiod overdose and left his 9 year old daughter fatherless (she is now 23 and doing well despite her loss). The other had no kids but went from opiates to heroin. He "died" twice but was saved thanks to narcan. He has been in and out of treatment that has basically bankrupted his parents. He has worked hard the last 5 years and is rebuilding his life. His addiction is a day to day struggle that he has to stay focused to continue to improve.

You are you. Heredity is a factor, but you can't use it as a reason for why you can't overcome your situation.

Seek out professional help, don't cling to your reasoning that "you have a good job and a truck" that rationalizes that you are functioning. You are barely surviving now.

VitalMX is not your resource for help in what you need to consider how to move forward but the fact you asked here indicates you are looking for resources. They are there, please, please for you and your young daughter, start today to begin the path to healing and being the person you want to be.

good luck. it's not easy. but you already know that too.

X2,. Life advice on vital with total strangers,. Not a good idea. Talk to someone qualified, in person.

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10/10/2017 9:13 PM

Man sorry to hear that. I can 100% relate as I went down the same path. For me it was tough getting my regular dose and had to quickly face the reality of quitting. A few things I did-

Taper off. Everyday. It’s tough but if you don’t and jump straight into cold turkey it will be a true nightmare as I’m sure you know. The acute wd were actually not as bad as I though when I did that.

Find a day that can really work for you to quit. And of course make sure your schedule is cleared for a number of days later.

Cut off all suppliers. This is a no brainer and and ABSOLUTE MUST. There’s no way around it.

Start working out now. Get those natural endorphins going. Because that is the main issue once you quit. Running is the best for this.

Don’t be afraid to reach out for help. Even with family members if need be.

Last one. This is important. Be prepared to fight a tough fight after acute wd is over. I don’t want to sound disheartening but it’s important to know what you’re up against. Post acute wd for many can be tougher than acute. It was for me. For some others of course post acute isn’t too bad. But just be aware that this condition exists and the key is to fight until you are living a good life again!

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10/10/2017 9:20 PM

So you went to your parents and after a few days gave up and left? What's going to make rehab different if you can check yourself out?
You have to want this bad enough to get through the withdraws. If you dont, you're not gonna. If you want to walk your daughter down the aisle, you'll stay in rehab and come out a better man.
Best of luck Doofy.
BTW I see guys thatve killed themselves after battling a drug addiction every day. For the love of god, please contact a therapist. Save the suicide hotline in your phone. Something. Life will get better.

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10/10/2017 9:37 PM
Edited Date/Time: 10/10/2017 9:41 PM

Whether through inpatient, outpatient, or whatever source used to aid in recovery, there is one constant and intangible varible that must be meet by all people for successful recovery. That is, an undeniable true desire to quit, deep in your core, where only you will really know it. If even the smallest amount of doubt exists within you, then successful rehab will likely elude you.

Finally, I would caution you about Narcanon as it is a Scientology program. Their ultimate goal will be to convert you to becoming a Scientologist.

As equally important, you cant do it alone and without outside assistance.

Just my .02 cents, FEIW.

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much ty. How to spot a paid forum poster/artificial forum traffic producer (see list of actions/phrases below):

Copius pattern amounts of phrases like “Anyone have”..., “Anybody know?”.... and their variations.

Thoughts?
Any help is appreciated!
Thanks in advance!





10/10/2017 11:12 PM

I appreciate all the feedback. I get it, who comes to a forum asking for life advice. Well, my loved ones have exhausted themselves of advice and i was seeing if anyone had a similar path.

And Im familiar with PAWS. Ive felt it myself. Its strange, you'd think one would be elated to break free from this life but I felt a great deal of absolutely nothing. We took the little one to disney world on the 4th of July, I had never been. All the sights and sounds, watching the reflection of the fireworks on the water at night, all I thought is damn, Ill never enjoy anything again.

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10/10/2017 11:18 PM

doofy wrote:

I appreciate all the feedback. I get it, who comes to a forum asking for life advice. Well, my loved ones have exhausted themselves of advice and i was seeing if anyone had a similar path.

And Im familiar with PAWS. Ive felt it myself. Its strange, you'd think one would be elated to break free from this life but I felt a great deal of absolutely nothing. We took the little one to disney world on the 4th of July, I had never been. All the sights and sounds, watching the reflection of the fireworks on the water at night, all I thought is damn, Ill never enjoy anything again.

Yup. Paws sucks. But you get through it like anything else. It takes time. And yes you will for sure feel good again. Great actually. There was a site I went to that helped during my time. Check out freefromhell.com lots of like minded people who can help.

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10/11/2017 12:26 AM

doofy wrote:

I appreciate all the feedback. I get it, who comes to a forum asking for life advice. Well, my loved ones have exhausted themselves of advice and i was seeing if anyone had a similar path.

And Im familiar with PAWS. Ive felt it myself. Its strange, you'd think one would be elated to break free from this life but I felt a great deal of absolutely nothing. We took the little one to disney world on the 4th of July, I had never been. All the sights and sounds, watching the reflection of the fireworks on the water at night, all I thought is damn, Ill never enjoy anything again.

Peartdrummer wrote:

Yup. Paws sucks. But you get through it like anything else. It takes time. And yes you will for sure feel good again. Great actually. There was a site I went to that helped during my time. Check out freefromhell.com lots of like minded people who can help.

Ive seen almost all the freefromhell and calmsupport videos on youtube. Ha, small world

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10/11/2017 12:47 AM

doofy wrote:

I appreciate all the feedback. I get it, who comes to a forum asking for life advice. Well, my loved ones have exhausted themselves of advice and i was seeing if anyone had a similar path.

And Im familiar with PAWS. Ive felt it myself. Its strange, you'd think one would be elated to break free from this life but I felt a great deal of absolutely nothing. We took the little one to disney world on the 4th of July, I had never been. All the sights and sounds, watching the reflection of the fireworks on the water at night, all I thought is damn, Ill never enjoy anything again.

Peartdrummer wrote:

Yup. Paws sucks. But you get through it like anything else. It takes time. And yes you will for sure feel good again. Great actually. There was a site I went to that helped during my time. Check out freefromhell.com lots of like minded people who can help.

doofy wrote:

Ive seen almost all the freefromhell and calmsupport videos on youtube. Ha, small world

Indeed. Well best of luck man!

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10/11/2017 2:45 AM

Best of luck doofy! You sound ready and I hope you actually are. I can't really relate. I'm 52, never had a drink or coffee in my entire life. I've taken painkillers for dental work, but they didn't seem to do anything beyond curbing the pain. My addictions are sugar, salt, chocolate, chips...shit like that. Ugh!

Get on that road and make that little girl, your parents/family, BabyMamma and YOU proud of you! They ALL want you back as the man they know you are deep inside! In this crazy world there is still a lot to live for. Best of luck!

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10/11/2017 5:37 AM

I can't add anything different than what has already been said, but I do hope you find the freedom you're searching for. It will be a tough mountain to climb, but others haven proven it's possible to overcome. Stay inspired and don't lose focus! Your mind has changed and it will take time to find your new normal, but don't quit.

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10/11/2017 9:37 AM

Have you heard of Sick Recovery? Personally don't know a whole lot about the program but seems like an awesome path for the mx minded. He's got a bunch of great videos on facebook too.

https://www.sickrecoveryllc.com/

https://www.facebook.com/sickrecovery/videos/1977289342519732/

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