Posts
113
Joined
3/15/2010
Location
CA
Edited Date/Time
1/27/2012 8:34am
Just starting over where another topic went off course.
Most people have what ifs, and "would've, could've, should've". Where should the line be drawn between pushing kids through your missed avenues and risking a missed regular childhood. Any sport can have this problem but I think it's the vast travel that really burdens the moto families. We hear the stories about the dedication and sacrifices that these superstar kid's families have made to get them there. But what about the people that made all of those sacrifices, and never made it. Then what....
Most people have what ifs, and "would've, could've, should've". Where should the line be drawn between pushing kids through your missed avenues and risking a missed regular childhood. Any sport can have this problem but I think it's the vast travel that really burdens the moto families. We hear the stories about the dedication and sacrifices that these superstar kid's families have made to get them there. But what about the people that made all of those sacrifices, and never made it. Then what....
I've got a strong feeling that if a parent is an Asshole - that's going to be true no matter if they end up in MX or Golf or Baseball. I see Kart families driving 3 & 4 states to run - Football kids going to these insane mini-camps (so they get "noticed") and so on. Most are truley dedicated - but the rest..........
By the same token, there are parents like that who take ZERO interest in their kids - and that is a fine line. Makes you wonder sometimes - if that really bad mini-parent didn't have MX, what would he be doing with his kid right now? Still yelling? Chasing him with a bat rather than a pitboard?
It would be an interesting study of say, LL 10 years ago. Of the mondo motorhome posse, how many even still ride anymore? What is it - 20k riders in the system each year but in the end just a couple follow through to the Pro ranks. Those numbers are to be expected but how many of those kids ended up with a "train wreck" of a childhood along the way - because it (their story-not the system) was parent-driven and not kid-driven.
If the parents are doing all of this sacrificing while expecting something in return it is just plain wrong no matter what sport.
Hopefully they had fun traveling and will give them something to talk about later on down the road . I have a friend that would go with us because his parents could care less about what he wanted to do for fun , too bad they can not share the road trip stories.
The Shop
Luxon 4-Post Bar Mounts
$189.95 - $239.95
DeCal Works Huge Plastic Inventory of UFO and Polisport kits.
I've got "non-moto" friends that can't believe we don't drag the boys into the racing. What the heck for? Motorcycles are suppose to be fun, not work. If "the bug" comes along and they pick some of the "old mans" passions that would be great - but I'm not gonna bet the farm on it.
But I tell ya, watching the "other" parents when 'da boys are in school? Scarry. There are a lot more parents like TA out there than you may think - they just live in other sports.
I saw these two parents at the track going crazy because their kid wasn't doing a jump. Mom was like "if he doesn't do that jump next moto we are packing up and going home."
Sounds like a real fun time for the kid.
I absolutely have lived life vicariously through my kids and loved most minutes
of it. And, i think we're all the better for it.
As an underachiever that did crappy at motocross, never sank a 3 pointer in
a b-b game, nor scored a football touchdown, nor hit a home-run or graduated from
high-school or college, I'm fortunate enough to have lived through these
moments with my kids and brag non-stop about it.
I think sometimes people equate living vicariously with being a crappy parent.
* It was actually my son - at 8 years old - who scolded me for not doing a
relatively easy double on my KX250 - that he was performing on his Cobra 50.
Talk about pressure. I did it, but could do without the name-calling, dammit.
so if dad wants to spend 100k + hoping little johnny can be the next big star in MX/SX he shouldn't waste his money. McGrath didn't even start riding motorcycles until he was 14 or 15 years old
Very good perspective Larry! My son began racing at age 7, and there were times when I pushed him. I quickly learned though, if he is not having fun, I'm wasting time and money. With our family, I spent countless weekends traveling with my boy racing over the last 11 years and would not trade this time for anything. Likewise, my wife and daughter traveled doing basketball & softball. Occasionally we all would go to one or the other as a "family"!
Our daughter received several scholarship offers in softball, but passed on them to become a respiratory therapist. With her, it was too much sports, and I think she just became burned out on the sports. She even raced a little at one point.
Then last year, my son decided he didn't want to race as much and basically took the summer off, but is now back in action. I suspect burn out as well.
I think the biggest joy, at least to us, was the time spent with our kids growing up. Honestly, I feel we are a "minority" in that respect...parents spending time with their kids!
Although my daughter could of had a college education paid for, my son is not the next RC. A decent "A" rider, who may make a little $$ here and there, but the thing is, we decided a long time ago it was just a hobby and nothing more! An expensive hobby, but still a hobby.
Pit Row
It's all about perspective.....
Not sure what else to do. I wanted to go give Dad a piece of his own medicine but didn't.
Which brings us back to the top of this post - losing sight of why you are out there. Is it for your kids & family or just for the parent? One has to think: "What if Jack McGrath chased LL when Jeremy was in grade school?" MC didn't race motorcycles until what, 14 or 15? Granted he was big into BMX but then he DID walk away from that now didn't he? I suspect the "time was right" for the McGrath family in both accounts - and they acted accordingly.
Shit, my life would be boring with out them.
One of my sons has been gone for almost 2 months sailing around the Caribbean with two English sisters he meet in Guatemala.
I'm having a blast on his vacation and I don't even have to leave my computer.
Best moments in my life have been watching my sons achievements, winning skateboard contests, graduating high school and college, getting married, going to dinner at his house, etc......
My kid used to skate in contests with a couple of top X-games guys, they all traded wins and he was also doing commercials. He was living what I thought was a dream. Then he said I'm over the contests an skating when they want me too so he bailed. He still skates and kills it, but it's just for fun. It's not how I would have done it but I wasn't the one doing it......
Post a reply to: Parents living vicariously through their kids.