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They went to that neighborhood and, my uncle floored his
El Camino. Just smoked out that entire street. Going back and, forth burning to those tires to get everyone’s attention. All kinds of those fuckers came out onto the street. He jumped out, told them what was up and, folded a couple of them in front of all their “homies”. But, he got the bike back while making those so called, hard core gangsters respect him. If he was pissed, oh boy.
Here’s the speech I gave this past Friday at his Celebration of Life. He set the bar in our family on taking care of, loving and, teaching respect.
Writing this was probably one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. So, please bear with me if I get a little choked up.
I’ll start off saying I lost an uncle, a brother, a father and, someone who I always looked up to. Someone I went to for advice as an adult.
My uncle was always the cool guy. The person I looked forward to seeing everyday as a kid. The person who always had something fun up his sleeve. Sometimes it was a flying fart . Other times it was throwing cups of ice water from the roof on people while they were sunbathing next to the pool. Going to his band practice. Watching in amazement as he played the drums. Hanging out at the beach or, going riding. Simply, talking about anything. Sharing laughs, jokes while we were both crashing out and watching old war movies, or even cartoons on a pull out couch at my grandparents house. Someone I always wanted to be around. Some of my best memories were when all of us were living together at my grandparents house. Val, Desiree, Little Ricky and, my uncle Rick.
He’s the reason I have such an appreciation for Led Zeppelin. We went camping for several days in Gorman. Spent the whole time riding. The funny thing is as stoked as he was to bring his radio and have tunes for the trip, he forgot his cassette case. That was ok though. There was one cassette in the radio. We listened to Led Zeppelins Physical Graffiti every night the whole five days we were there. That was my introduction to Zeppelin. I was only ten.
He was also the person who I’d have fun getting into trouble with for our usual shenanigans. . Shooting birds with pellet guns was always on the menu. Usually in my grandparents backyard while hearing my grandmother scream god dammit at both of us . Of course She saw we were scooping one out of the swimming pool with a net.
Our favorite birds to shoot were a doves. Who would’ve thought they tasted so good? Sautéed in butter with a little red wine. A dash of garlic salt. I even tried showing my friend how to clean and cook a dove the way Rick showed me. Unfortunately, we were kicked out of his mothers kitchen before we could cook it. I can still laugh about the things Rick and, I did together . Others might get pissed but, it was funny to us. That’s all that mattered. I still remember it all like it was yesterday. We even had food fights on the freeway with other drivers.
Rick was the guy who gave me a C battery after I got bullied by an older kid and came home with a bloody nose.
He told me, now close your fist around it like this. Now, go back and kick his ass. He’s cheating by being older and bigger. Level the playing field a little. Guess what. I won.
I will say, Rick let me know If I screwed up. Just that look of disappointment said it all. It also let me know I was pushing my luck. I can never thank him enough for the situations he helped me out of as a troubled teen. He also let me know when I did something well. Like holding a throttle wide open on a bike I couldn’t even touch the ground on. There was nothing that made me feel cooler then getting a thumbs up from him .
He was always firm but, fair. But, either way, there was always love. There was never a doubt he was on your side.
I don’t really think there’s one word to describe my uncle Rick. He was an awesome person who’s laugh was infectious. His cheerful smile.
His appreciation of music, having a good time.
His generosity of offering you his only coat cause he noticed you were freezing your ass off. That was just him.
If I had to choose a couple of words to describe him, it would be a lover of life and, a big kid at heart who always had your back.
You’ll be missed and, loved always Uncle Rick
OP... sorry I don’t mean to derail the thread. Just showing what my example of parenting was.
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Zeppelin
Rockin’ the drums like Bonham
Dealing with problems directly
Uncle Rick: Pure Dude
Since the subject sort of turned towards corporal punishment in schools, I am one that is sort of glad that it is gone. Not for the vast majority of us, of course. I got my share of 'hacks' when I was a student and I pretty much deserved all of them. None of them were vicious, but I did see a classmate who got a serious back injury from a jackass teacher with a power complex.
I'm mostly glad that they are gone because of my youngest son. He has some special needs. He was born addicted to heroin and meth and he is simply wired differently than my other kids. He's the kid who probably would have gotten swatted nearly every day in school, and no matter how many times he was hit there is no way to 'beat his disabilities out of him'. He was responsive to other methods of behavior change, but beating him wasn't one of those.
My other 3 kids might have gotten swatted once or twice during their schooling if it was allowed, but realistically those were almost exclusively reserved for us boys when I was in school. Girls weren't swatted even for the same offenses as boys were.
The fear of the corporal punishment kept me in line
😉
Anyway I also understand if you don’t want to discuss. I hope he’s doing okay 🙏👍
We adopted him when he was 1 (actually took longer for the adoption to be final, but he was just a few weeks from his first birthday when he came to live with us and never left!). His older sister was 3.
I'm pretty sure that it was a 'cold turkey' sort of thing without very much support from his birth parents to be honest. It did stunt his development quite a bit as he didn't start walking on his own until about 3 1/2 and didn't speak coherently until he was close to 5.
Helps us narrow down who goes in the woodchipper and who doesn't.
Decent people try to be decent people all the time. And nearly everyone on here seems very decent at their core. It's just likely that they have never been in the same situation.
But one thing that it has definitely taught me/reinforced in me is that you can try to parent all of your children as equally as possible and still get vastly different results. I am fortunate that my 'vastly different results' never rose to the level of violence or law breaking, but all 4 of my kids (2 biological, 2 adopted) are 4 absolutely unique individuals despite their very similar upbringings for the bulk of their lives.
And back to corporal punishment, no swat I ever received at school was as much of a deterrent to me as was the look of disappointment that my dad would have when I failed him. I tried not to do that very often because of that!!!!!!!!!
We began the process in late 2008 and closed it out in 2011. We took her to her first Supercross at A1 in 2009 (She'd started staying with us just before the 2008-9 Holidays via a Fost-Adopt program). The adoption process completed in the spring of 2011.
I learned A LOT during the classes and training...yes,"training" that they put us thru. You gain compassion for people that are going thru absolute shit...and people born into it...it was "necessary" for me to go thru all that and take it in. We write people off, sometimes, without even trying to look into what got them where they are at...or stuck at...and how cyclical some things are.
In the end, the process is a learning experience and one of life's greater gifts.
Pit Row
But I look back at some kids I went to school with who had so many similar behavior issues and were constantly getting swats. Now, as an adult, I run into those same 'kids' and the vast majority of them never really were able to overcome whatever issues they had. And a part of me thinks that at least some of it is because they were beat for their inabilities to do things the way the 'normal' kids did and that resulted in them thinking that they were never going to be able to do much else. Back then you had to have some serious cognitive disabilities to be in 'special ed', and we didn't understand as much about behavioral disabilities that are caused by things such as drug abuse in the womb, etc.
So while there are definitely times that I wish I could turn some kids I see over my knee and give them a spanking, the logical part of me wishes that I could understand what is that keeps them from behaving. Some of it is likely willful, but I would bet that a very large portion of it is due to either their own disabilities or is a reaction to what sort of punishments they've received in the past. My youngest son now holds down a full time job, has been promoted a couple of times, and has the potential for a 'normal' life. Back when I was a kid he probably would have ended up being a high school dropout without much of a future, and he would have been swatted a few times a week (or more) just to reinforce that he was a 'bad kid'.
I can’t tell you how many people I have worked with that don’t understand how tax brackets work. Freelancers who have said to me “I can’t afford to take another job this year, I’ll be in a new tax bracket. Not knowing, only the money earned above said bracket gets taxed at the higher rate 🤦🏻♂️. Seriously frustrating that this is a question ask when our schools already don’t setup kids for successful adult lives.
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