Off-Week Dipshit Posts

Void Main wrote:

Free Lenny!!

olddude wrote:

I understand the importance of helium in mx tyres, but what pressures should I run them at?

wardy wrote:

i think two strokes work better then 4 strokes.

just sayin.,

swizcore wrote:

Please, keep all the dumbass off-week thoughts in this single thread. The mods will appreciate the conciseness of dumbassery.

Consider this the first.

Bucky Wheat wrote:

TerryK wrote:

Har!

TriRacer27 wrote:

If VitalMX had a news show (which would of course be read by Ms. Erin Bates): This week in Vital, First up, a doctor imagined Christophe...

If VitalMX had a news show (which would of course be read by Ms. Erin Bates):

This week in Vital,

First up, a doctor imagined Christophe Pourcel as a woman, yes a woman! Fellow poster 500Guy somehow approved which caused an uproar over Christophe Pourcel's career. Would it continue to flourish, or would it make an abrupt change to match his fan's fantasy sex change? This led to some arguing and ended in a fight over who had gone to the most races in a year, who knew Christophe the best, psychic powers and a lawsuit filing for unlawful butthurt.

More recently, Chad Reed has been in the news concerning his Epstein Barr Virus. Initial reactions, driven mainly by a vapid misunderstanding of the condition, caused market valuations for all frosty alcoholic beverages to drop until fans realized this had nothing to do, and could not be contacted from, their local bar. This, of course, led to riots on the streets of Vital with members of the community adamantly expressing their opinions about Chad's true purpose in life, basing their factual opinions on their extensive experience with viruses - this being every virus except EBV.

Also, more random bear sightings (WTF?)

Now in education news, school officials have just release a shocking report indicating that school absences this year have jumped by 30%. Further investigation revealed many of these kids are having to miss school due to horrendous motorcycle accidents. When asked what he could attribute this to, the director of Vital Education had this to say, "We were expecting to have more injured kids this time of year with the X-Games coming up, but not at this level. The fault lies firmly in the hands of the Bike Choice Council, who purposely suggested to many of these kids to purchase AF500 two strokes and 450 four strokes as their first bikes." Sad news indead. The smartasses from the Bike Choice Council were not available for comment, claiming they were too busy sniffing gasoline in order to answer questions about which gas to use.

And in our top story of the week, San Manuel Yamaha Deft Family Adoptee Josh Hill went skydiving out of his YZ450F. Controversy erupted in the community over managerial abilities at the San Manuel Team, which naturally led to controversy about Chad Reed, which of course had to lead to arguments over which rider had the hottest wife, and of course ended in another butthurt lawsuit. The main culprit was eventually determined to be Jason Lawrence and all 4-strokes in general.

Finally, the pricing has been announced for the new KTM 350. It will cost 12,999 Euros in Europe, or $3499 in the United States, because apparently it is the only place on earth with dirt unsuitable for the 350 (tampons not included). What a shame, no one saw that one coming. This announcement, naturally, led to more riots in the streets between the Pre-MiX gang and a coalition between the Floating Valves gang and Tony Alessi's hired hitmen.

Tune in next week when we reveal the results of the Ryan vs. Ryan test, proper podium etiquette, the breakup of all factory teams into smaller privateer teams and as always, 2-stroke vs. 4-stroke and more bears.




OK, time for me to step away from the keyboard and hit the sac.

TriRacer27 wrote:

If VitalMX had a news show (which would of course be read by Ms. Erin Bates): This week in Vital, First up, a doctor imagined Christophe...

If VitalMX had a news show (which would of course be read by Ms. Erin Bates):

This week in Vital,

First up, a doctor imagined Christophe Pourcel as a woman, yes a woman! Fellow poster 500Guy somehow approved which caused an uproar over Christophe Pourcel's career. Would it continue to flourish, or would it make an abrupt change to match his fan's fantasy sex change? This led to some arguing and ended in a fight over who had gone to the most races in a year, who knew Christophe the best, psychic powers and a lawsuit filing for unlawful butthurt.

More recently, Chad Reed has been in the news concerning his Epstein Barr Virus. Initial reactions, driven mainly by a vapid misunderstanding of the condition, caused market valuations for all frosty alcoholic beverages to drop until fans realized this had nothing to do, and could not be contacted from, their local bar. This, of course, led to riots on the streets of Vital with members of the community adamantly expressing their opinions about Chad's true purpose in life, basing their factual opinions on their extensive experience with viruses - this being every virus except EBV.

Also, more random bear sightings (WTF?)

Now in education news, school officials have just release a shocking report indicating that school absences this year have jumped by 30%. Further investigation revealed many of these kids are having to miss school due to horrendous motorcycle accidents. When asked what he could attribute this to, the director of Vital Education had this to say, "We were expecting to have more injured kids this time of year with the X-Games coming up, but not at this level. The fault lies firmly in the hands of the Bike Choice Council, who purposely suggested to many of these kids to purchase AF500 two strokes and 450 four strokes as their first bikes." Sad news indead. The smartasses from the Bike Choice Council were not available for comment, claiming they were too busy sniffing gasoline in order to answer questions about which gas to use.

And in our top story of the week, San Manuel Yamaha Deft Family Adoptee Josh Hill went skydiving out of his YZ450F. Controversy erupted in the community over managerial abilities at the San Manuel Team, which naturally led to controversy about Chad Reed, which of course had to lead to arguments over which rider had the hottest wife, and of course ended in another butthurt lawsuit. The main culprit was eventually determined to be Jason Lawrence and all 4-strokes in general.

Finally, the pricing has been announced for the new KTM 350. It will cost 12,999 Euros in Europe, or $3499 in the United States, because apparently it is the only place on earth with dirt unsuitable for the 350 (tampons not included). What a shame, no one saw that one coming. This announcement, naturally, led to more riots in the streets between the Pre-MiX gang and a coalition between the Floating Valves gang and Tony Alessi's hired hitmen.

Tune in next week when we reveal the results of the Ryan vs. Ryan test, proper podium etiquette, the breakup of all factory teams into smaller privateer teams and as always, 2-stroke vs. 4-stroke and more bears.




OK, time for me to step away from the keyboard and hit the sac.

TriRacer27 wrote:

If VitalMX had a news show (which would of course be read by Ms. Erin Bates): This week in Vital, First up, a doctor imagined Christophe...

If VitalMX had a news show (which would of course be read by Ms. Erin Bates):

This week in Vital,

First up, a doctor imagined Christophe Pourcel as a woman, yes a woman! Fellow poster 500Guy somehow approved which caused an uproar over Christophe Pourcel's career. Would it continue to flourish, or would it make an abrupt change to match his fan's fantasy sex change? This led to some arguing and ended in a fight over who had gone to the most races in a year, who knew Christophe the best, psychic powers and a lawsuit filing for unlawful butthurt.

More recently, Chad Reed has been in the news concerning his Epstein Barr Virus. Initial reactions, driven mainly by a vapid misunderstanding of the condition, caused market valuations for all frosty alcoholic beverages to drop until fans realized this had nothing to do, and could not be contacted from, their local bar. This, of course, led to riots on the streets of Vital with members of the community adamantly expressing their opinions about Chad's true purpose in life, basing their factual opinions on their extensive experience with viruses - this being every virus except EBV.

Also, more random bear sightings (WTF?)

Now in education news, school officials have just release a shocking report indicating that school absences this year have jumped by 30%. Further investigation revealed many of these kids are having to miss school due to horrendous motorcycle accidents. When asked what he could attribute this to, the director of Vital Education had this to say, "We were expecting to have more injured kids this time of year with the X-Games coming up, but not at this level. The fault lies firmly in the hands of the Bike Choice Council, who purposely suggested to many of these kids to purchase AF500 two strokes and 450 four strokes as their first bikes." Sad news indead. The smartasses from the Bike Choice Council were not available for comment, claiming they were too busy sniffing gasoline in order to answer questions about which gas to use.

And in our top story of the week, San Manuel Yamaha Deft Family Adoptee Josh Hill went skydiving out of his YZ450F. Controversy erupted in the community over managerial abilities at the San Manuel Team, which naturally led to controversy about Chad Reed, which of course had to lead to arguments over which rider had the hottest wife, and of course ended in another butthurt lawsuit. The main culprit was eventually determined to be Jason Lawrence and all 4-strokes in general.

Finally, the pricing has been announced for the new KTM 350. It will cost 12,999 Euros in Europe, or $3499 in the United States, because apparently it is the only place on earth with dirt unsuitable for the 350 (tampons not included). What a shame, no one saw that one coming. This announcement, naturally, led to more riots in the streets between the Pre-MiX gang and a coalition between the Floating Valves gang and Tony Alessi's hired hitmen.

Tune in next week when we reveal the results of the Ryan vs. Ryan test, proper podium etiquette, the breakup of all factory teams into smaller privateer teams and as always, 2-stroke vs. 4-stroke and more bears.




OK, time for me to step away from the keyboard and hit the sac.

jasonv43 wrote:

Now that's funny right there. I don't care who you are.

Classic.

wardy wrote:

i think two strokes work better then 4 strokes.

just sayin.,

Cygnus wrote:

This place neds more Yamaboy.

SMITH201 wrote:

Thots?

Cygnus wrote:

This place neds more Yamaboy.

jasonv43 wrote:

Actually I was thinking it needed more Cowbell. [img]http://diannehanks.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/08/cowbell.jpg[/img]

Actually I was thinking it needed more Cowbell.

wired4speed wrote:

Only on p. 2 and this dipshit post is already living up to its full potential. I predict 153 pages of dipshit posts before the next...

Only on p. 2 and this dipshit post is already living up to its full potential. I predict 153 pages of dipshit posts before the next gate drop at a National MX.