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Location
Carson, CA
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Edited Date/Time
6/20/2022 8:53am
Profeshenal, I know you got a few.
Anyone else have any good stripper stories?
I’ll go first.
Last time I went to a strip club, I got 86’d. I was only 25 at the time. It was my friends 21st birthday. We split a fifth of Jack Daniels between three of us before heading there. We were pretty trashed when we walked in. Music was decent, there were actually a couple dancers that were really good looking. But, this one in particular... Damn. We were both staring at each other right off the bat.
I just did a side job and, had some extra money so, I bought the first round and, started laying ten dollar bills on the table for our group. The other side of the table was pretty pissed cause the girls were only paying attention to us. Finally, after about 45 minutes, that hot chick came out to Motley Crue’s Red Hot song. After a little dance she came right in front of me and, pressed my head into her melons. She straddled me, went to sit down on my lap and, let out this blood curdling scream. I forgot I had a cigarette in my hand which was placed on my lap (did I mention I was drunk?). Looking at my broken cigarette, she leaned back and, looked down at her beaver. Yep, burned and, got her right in the middle. I started laughing while my friends were looking bewildered. She screamed, you think this is FN funny?!?! Yeah, kinda. My friends looked scared. I’m still laughing. Now, I’m getting called an asshole. I was like look, here’s $100, I’m out.
The bouncer comes over, grabs both my friends and, kicks us all out. The birthday boy got punched in the mouth. He was hammered and, couldn’t quit laughing. He then yells, with blood dripping, that was awesome! Best birthday ever!!
I have a couple more but, one at a time.
Mods, if this is inappropriate, feel free to delete.
Anyone else have any good stripper stories?
I’ll go first.
Last time I went to a strip club, I got 86’d. I was only 25 at the time. It was my friends 21st birthday. We split a fifth of Jack Daniels between three of us before heading there. We were pretty trashed when we walked in. Music was decent, there were actually a couple dancers that were really good looking. But, this one in particular... Damn. We were both staring at each other right off the bat.
I just did a side job and, had some extra money so, I bought the first round and, started laying ten dollar bills on the table for our group. The other side of the table was pretty pissed cause the girls were only paying attention to us. Finally, after about 45 minutes, that hot chick came out to Motley Crue’s Red Hot song. After a little dance she came right in front of me and, pressed my head into her melons. She straddled me, went to sit down on my lap and, let out this blood curdling scream. I forgot I had a cigarette in my hand which was placed on my lap (did I mention I was drunk?). Looking at my broken cigarette, she leaned back and, looked down at her beaver. Yep, burned and, got her right in the middle. I started laughing while my friends were looking bewildered. She screamed, you think this is FN funny?!?! Yeah, kinda. My friends looked scared. I’m still laughing. Now, I’m getting called an asshole. I was like look, here’s $100, I’m out.
The bouncer comes over, grabs both my friends and, kicks us all out. The birthday boy got punched in the mouth. He was hammered and, couldn’t quit laughing. He then yells, with blood dripping, that was awesome! Best birthday ever!!
I have a couple more but, one at a time.
Mods, if this is inappropriate, feel free to delete.
Nuff Said
A buddy and I laughed a chubby stripper off the stage at a Pensacola strip club when I was in Navy photo school in '96. The place was under a freeway overpass, and it was the day shift if that gives you any idea of the "quality" of these ladies.
In Thailand, I watched a stripper shoot ping pong balls out of her hoo-hoo, then sit on a bottle of dark liquid, roll on her back and drain it into herself, and stand up and refill the bottle with the same amount of clear liquid. That was at Marilyn's for anyone who's been there.
Probably the only cool one I went to though, was The Raunchy Restaurant in Freemantle AUS. It was a strip/burlesque dinner show that actually had a little bit of production value, actual hot chicks, and the food wasn't half bad. I don't think they had a liquor license, so they couldn't sell alcohol in the place, but if you gave $20 to the hostess at the door, she would run to the liquor store down the street, buy what you wanted, and they would keep it in their reefer and refill you whenever you needed it. Plus, it was in Freemantle/Perth, one of my favorite places I've ever been.
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You brush it on, and the paint begins to bubble, wrinkle, and fall off like magic.
There was a club just blocks from my house so I suggested we start there, and work up to the good ones.
Well the first dancer was cute enough, but she had a full length cast on her leg, and was about 8 months pregnant.
Everyone felt sorry for her and tipped her, but yeah...
It could only get better, right?
This was probably 20y ago - I'm 46 now.
Walked in and they had a girl selling beer out of a tub with ice while topless. I realized she was the younger sister of a different buddy from high school. HAHA - she was all red faced and I was chuckling like a fool.
Fast forward 6 hours.
I shagged her at the hotel room we got for all of us to crash at before they all came back from the bar. Never heard from her again. Goooooooooooooooood times.
a girl i dated for a while started stripping after we broke up but would still invite me to watch so me and my buddies would round up and head down. she used her daughters name for her stage name, lol, not cool but hey she's a stripper now. classy chick, took her on the boat a couple times and would tie up to all my friends. she'd usually be topless until she got busted for nude in public, got off on a warning but good times.
used to stop just outside of Umatilla, Oregon on our way to Washougal and sleep down by the river. we'd head up to the little strip club next to the Tillicum-Inn... little shit-hole but it was 18 and up so no booze but it was fully nude. was free to get in but you had to buy a soda, so we'd sneak in some whiskey and get lit up. some fun nights there.
a local place (Southern Exposure, now shut down) used to have midget wrestling a couple times a year. go watch some little people beat the shit out of each-other then head over to the stage to see some roast beef.
lot of crazy times in Vegas strip clubs, one particular time we get there around midnight and walk out at 7am and stagger back to the hotel, broke so we couldn't even call a cab, drunk out of our minds, and we walked from the Circus-Circus to the MGM. by the time we got to the hotel we were sober enough to head to Sam Boyd for the supercross. that was a rough one.
last but not least, down in Mexico me and a buddy went to one a few blocks from our hotel. all the rest of our group decided to sit it out but we still wanted to party. we get in there and it's nothing special, girls are ok not great. drinks are flowing and here come this American guy and his smoking hot girl. they sit kinda by us and the working staff is loading them up with drinks. we were getting ready to leave when the strippers started trying to get the girl to go up on stage, she seems interested but her dude isn't having it. me and my buddy decide to wait it out and see if she goes up. about an hour later dude walks outside and she disappears back-stage. about 5 minutes later here she comes on stage in her bra and panties and gets it on. me and my bud are just sitting in amazement, this girl was a 10 for sure, and she's getting after it. 2 songs in and she's bared it all and just getting down. dude comes back in and does a "what-the-fuck" but sits down and enjoys the show. we buy him a drink and shoot the shit with him while we watch his chick do her thing. by far my best strip club experience, girl was unreal.
I had to occasionally do service calls for these place’s.
I headed to Little Darlings as they needed a blockage cleared. Unfortunately, the clean out was in the dancer’s dressing room. So, I pushed my snake back there, pulled up a bucket, took a seat and, started running my cable down the line. A dancer came into the area so, I stopped, stood up so she could walk around me. She was completely naked. I told her I could step out. She said, go ahead and, keep working, I’ll go around you. Plus, you ain’t getting any for free. Seriously, I’ll pass I told her.
She proceeded to climb on the table in front of me, crawling on all fours (as I’m running the cable down) and, turned her ass toward my face. She then asked what, no tip? I said I’m good, I’m not interested. Just here to do my job. She started yelling at me about the same time I felt tension building up on the cable. I told her, you need to move. Three times I told her. She said, fuck you each time. The cable started building pressure, I nodded my head to tip my face shield down and, the cable broke through the blockage violently. I tiger striped her with everything that was on my cable from running it in and, out of the line. The other girls were laughing. I shut the machine off and, loaded up my tools. I told the dancer I had issues with, you better shower. After that I handed the owner the ticket to sign off on and, on to the next job I went.
Pit Row
All his buddies had money. They rented a real bus.
Porn on the video screens, whiskey and beer, the whole deal.
Sadly for me, I very recently broke my right clavicle and my left arm, like 6 days prior.
I'm there for Jimmy, but not really having much of a good time.
One club we stopped at, I was hurting pretty bad, so I didn't sit at the stage, and sat at a table.
This was the days before plating clavicles, so I had one of those strap things on, and a cast. Well this dancer walked up and said "you need to talk about it"? She was wearing sweat pants and a long sleeve shirt.
I said "not much to say, I can barely wipe my ass, but other than that, shit's great."
She babbled for a couple of minutes then got up and wanted $20.00.
"FOR WHAT?" She raised hell, when the bouncer got there, saw mine and her condition, he told her to pound sand.
I was working out of town a long time ago. My construction crew and, I went to a club after placing bets. I bet a co worker if one of us couldn’t get one to go home with us, the loser slept in the work van. No blanket or, pillow. It was like 14 degrees out.
Needless to say, after walking into this shit hole I wanted to lose. But, instead of giving in and, freezing my ass off, I walked up to the ugliest, fattest scalawag and, told her about the bet. I told her I’d give her $100 if she walked up to me later that evening and, invited me back to her place in front of my table. She accepted my proposition. Granted, I gave her a ride home to play it off but, my buddy ended up sleeping in the van and freezing his ass off. I dropped her off, went and, had a decent dinner at a restaurant then, headed back to the hotel to make sure he slept in the van. Everyone thought I banged this chick that looked like a white VW bug with four flat tires. Until, I told them what I had done the following morning.
Best $100 I ever spent.
The man who brought the fattest chick by the table won a bottle of choice.
I used to act like I was playing the game, but would always bring sexy girls by. I lost a lot.
One night my friend's sister was at the same place as us, but it was a different circle of people than her. She was big, I'm talking kill you if she's on top big.
I told her what the boys were doing, and she said "Hell yeah". We sauntered by, danced about 3 songs, went by again as we walked out.
She had fun, and I got a hundred dollar bottle of scotch.
We brought a keg to a BYOB nude joint in whiskey flats.
This cure young girl was picking rolled dollars from dudes lips.
Well I let the dollar slide into my mouth and gave her a little hello.
She was OK with that. So later....
She is serving us, and a guy I worked with thought he was hitting it off with the same chick.
She was bent over talking to him, and he made his hand approach. Too late. My thumb was 1st knuckle deep.
The look on his face when he ran into my hand was priceless.
I was also selling cocaine at the time, so easy catch.
Hahaha. Good thing your buddy didn't freeze to death.
They’d always be brought on stage, whipped, slapped, clobbered with breasts and underwear tore off…the usual.
First words after would be “unberievable”..
We notice about 5 seconds in that right across from us is our hockey coach. I'm not sure who was freaking out more, him or us. He got up immediately, threw us a few dollar bills and said " have fun boys" then bolted.
Later on, I have a few more stories but I'll just end it with that I'm really glad I am still std free to this day.
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