Posts
290
Joined
2/20/2011
Location
TN
US
Edited Date/Time
1/27/2012 11:54am
I have a few, but am looking for some new stuff to add. Below are the things that drive her the most crazy:
1. I'll fart, but rarely do they smell. I go for volume and duration. It is especially good when I do it loud enough for others to hear (in a store) and quickly blame it on her. When they do smell, I'll fan them her way or fan the sheets. Once I farted into my cupped hand and 'threw' it at her - for some reason, she really didn't find the humor in that....
2. When she is bent over doing something, I'll drive my finger into her 'brown button'. Especially good when she is wearing sweats or thin pants. I normally have to run after I do it.
3. I'll put the cap back on things REALLY tight, like the Diet Coke bottle.
4. Run her toothbrush under water, then deny using it.
5. Tickle her.
Like I said, I need some new stuff - any ideas?
1. I'll fart, but rarely do they smell. I go for volume and duration. It is especially good when I do it loud enough for others to hear (in a store) and quickly blame it on her. When they do smell, I'll fan them her way or fan the sheets. Once I farted into my cupped hand and 'threw' it at her - for some reason, she really didn't find the humor in that....
2. When she is bent over doing something, I'll drive my finger into her 'brown button'. Especially good when she is wearing sweats or thin pants. I normally have to run after I do it.
3. I'll put the cap back on things REALLY tight, like the Diet Coke bottle.
4. Run her toothbrush under water, then deny using it.
5. Tickle her.
Like I said, I need some new stuff - any ideas?
6. Hang out on Vitalmx.com.
The Shop
Fart in bed and pull the covers over her head. Hers are worse though - Dear Lord!
Burp
Breathe right in her face
Scratch my rear.
Grab dat ass when anyone-else might see.
Have to leave for another trip at the least minute/ f-up her plans for the wknd.
Invite her family over without telling.
Go get Buffalo wings for watching the Supercross when she is making food in the kitchen (Just slip out and leave)
Open a can of soda take a drink and put it back
Do the "Are you really going out like that?" Usually when she is wearing sweatpants or something.
If I'm in the room, I'll repeat "um" or "you know?" every time she says it.
If she leaves the room to get away from the heckling, I follow her.
This normally ends with her locked it the bathroom, and me outside the door saying, "Um, you know?" over and over.
34 years in Sept.
Pit Row
I've done the same thing, Torco. But my wife has left some logs, let me tell you!
Why is it, that my wife always waits till we're laying in bed, dog tired, to start talking. It's almost like she has no idea that I have to go to work the next day! And I don't know what it is about her voice, but when I hear it, I immediately begin feeling sleepy. I have fought and fought to stay awake while she is rattling off, but it is no use. Can you believe she gets mad cause I fell asleep when she is going on for like an hour at 11:30 at night?
One thing I like to do to my new girlfriend is when we are in a crowded public place, say something really akward and kinda loud so every one else can here it. My favorite is "I took a shower but my butt still itches"(Stolen from the Chappelle show) or "hang on honey, I gotta go take a shit"
I want to pre-apologize to anyone that may be offended by this post.
Calling her bluff when she was "sick". It never failed, come race day, she wouldnt feel good. That shit got old.
Lusting after all her friends.
2nd wife, pretty much everything I did pissed her off. She thought every man was supposed to be just like her dad.
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